Saturday, December 27, 2008

Holiday Recap

On our way to deliver pies. We didnt wear red and green on purpose. No, really! Cats kno that the papur is bettur than the giffs!
Hello folks. I hope you had a swell time with your relatives and there was no coal in your stocking. I am so happy to announce that at my last visit to the chiropractor, something good happened and I am feeling like 95% better! Instead of taking advil constantly like I have in the past three weeks, I am down to taking it just a couple times a day. Perhaps it was that gadget he strapped around my chin and then pulled really hard. I felt my neck pop a couple of times, and maybe after that I was even a skoshe taller. I just hope that horrible pain does not come back, I have had enough, thank you.
We had a totally mellow and fun Christmas day. It was a little weird being around here instead of Bangalore, but I enjoyed it. We were pretty grateful for the simple way we chose to celebrate, just the three of us, for when we surprised our friends by barging over on Christmas morning with a blackberry pie, we found the mama of the house standing in the hallway in tears. Apparently, her big sister had once again sabotaged the family get together so that she could have it "her way." After some necessary comforting of the mama, Mr Ratburn, Little Rita and I then went out looking for some cheeseburgers and fries, but got no results, so we headed home and made our own.
Later on, Mr Ratburn and I got a chance to check out the ice shot glasses, my absolutely favorite gift which you see in the photo above. Ok, I admit, I am a little more than excited about the ice glasses in the video, but I just can't help it, they are so dang cool! And, you will see I am trying not to be too loud, it's about 3 am and our yurt is not soundproof! (Goodness knows what the neighbors have heard through the walls of the yurt!) Just more crazy drinking exploits....

PS Doncha just hate it when you wish someone "Happy Holidays" because you want to include whatever it is they celebrate and they come back with a slightly rude "MERRY CHRISTMAS", as if that is the ONLY celebration that matters, and darn it, they want you to know it! Or that it doesn't matter to them that we have Kwanzaa, Hannukah and Winter Solstice all at the same time as Christmas and some of those things might matter to some of us?
Merry Whatever!


Monday, December 22, 2008

Happy Holidays, Y'all!

Pardon the rerun, but Mr Ratburn and I make cute ornaments, dontcha think?

I'm off to the mall with Little Rita to soak up some holiday fun. I can honestly say there is NOTHING in the mall that I want since I shop at ETSY, but LR likes to hang out there and since I am able to act accordingly so as not to embarrass her, I am still allowed to accompany her , I might as well enjoy it while I can.
What I'd really like to do is stand above Santa on the upper level and drop mini chocolate chip cookies on his head. Now that would be fun.
I've just come back from the chiro. This is my 5th visit and I think we finally got that painful spot to give a little. Last Friday, he gave me this silly thing to wear on my neck! I feel like an African princess while wearing it, neck extended skyward.
Have a lovely day!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Thursday Portrait

I haven't had time to fiddle with my camera in awhile been in the mood to smile pretty for the camera so today you get what's inside my head. As if you didn't know, I always have India on my mind, especially images of mahouts standing in the festering Yamuna! (My apologies, Monaji.)
Karen sent me this picture, cannot remember where it came from,but I just adore it.
And here's another favorite of mine, also from Karenji.
I would normally be in India already this time of year, so I am missing it. I cannot imagine wanting to trek around with this neck pain, though. I have 7 weeks to get rid of it!

Have a lovely day!


Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Pain In The Neck Update....

**Ok would you believe it, it's 20 degrees outside and still NO SNOW! Drop the other shoe, willya?** Sure, go ahead and saw me in half while I stand here calmly! Oh wait, he seems to be woeing just a little. Now, tell me, if you were being sawed in half would you stand there calmly? NO! You would scream really LOUD.
Until 2 weeks ago, I had no idea what CHRONIC pain was all about. Now I do. It sucks. End of story. I am struggling through a nice stack of work that I am truly grateful for, but to then spend all my earnings on Chiropractors...ARGHH!!! My head feels like it weighs 50 pounds because my neck doesn't want to hold it up. I need some brain scaffolding! Truly, I do have a large cranium, which has never been too much of a problem until now.

In other news, I can't get that stupid Coldplay song out of my head. You know the one, I'm not gonna say it because then I'll be in trouble for planting it in other peoples brains. Maybe that song is what's causing all this pain!

We are having lots of fun "doing Christmas" this year since I am not going to India until February. You won't believe it, but even Mr Ratburn took LR to a tree farm and sawed it down himself! Oy his poor mom mighta rolled over in her grave, but let me tell you it was worth it for Gary and LR to share that experience, and I got a good chuckle at the thought of my jewish hubby at a Christmas tree farm, proving you're never too old for firsts.

It has almost snowed here a number of times this week. I say almost because after all, snow in the bay area is not normal. We did get some fun hail in San Francisco and here too, and this morning it was about 25, and my car door was frosted shut. Come on, just snow already!
Now, I have lived here 17 years, and it has only snowed once, for about 25 minutes. That was in the middle of the night and we all got up to play in the snow at 3 am. It was lovely.
I hope all of you are well out there in blogland. Pass the vicodin.

Have a lovely day!


Friday, December 12, 2008

Thank Goodness for Chiropractors....

Too many rupees have been spent in an all out effort to get the Barefoot Mistress' spine back into a straight line! It's....still.....not.....there.....ArghhHHHHHH!!!!!!!
(Why is that lady's breast out?)
Have a lovely weekend, everyone.
OK now thats three years in a row that 55 days has landed on Flash Fiction Friday

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Happy Birthday G~Man!

This one's for you, Rocket Man! :P

I hope your birthday is fabulous, Galen!

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

New Music, Yay!!!!!

I love getting ahold of new music, don't you? This is Katie Costello.

Of course, my pal that turned me onto Katie Costello is a bit odd, and this is the tune he chose to share with me first...

The neck kink is getting worse. I'm dyin' here!
Have a lovely day, I will be attempting various neck relieving yoga poses...

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Happy Monday

I ate three fortune cookies on my birthday...

You are surrounded by true friends.
Soon, you will receive pleasant news.
You will find your horizons suddenly broadened.
I have a terrible kink in my neck. I cannot blog or sew or anythinggggg!!
Have a lovely day!


Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Thursday Portrait

I live in a very small town. Apparently, rubber duckies are in. This was my only choice. It's sorta growing on me.
Have a wonderful day!


Monday, December 01, 2008

It's true.....

The rumours you may have heard are true.

Today is my birthday. There will be no naked birthday photo.

That dress form is my birthday present from Mr Ratburn!
Isn't it cool?

Happy Birthday to me!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thursday Thanksgiving Portrait

Just another idyllic day in the orchard...

When suddenly......

My gosh, it isn't even safe in your own backyard anymore.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone

and do be careful!


PS If anyone has anything negative to say about India and those bombings, I can't hear you! I can't hear you! I can't hear you. Tummmm teee tummmmm.....

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Houston, we have a problem....

Yes, that is my oven, in pieces, two days before Thanksgiving.
I don't really like to cook turkey anyway...
(coke box used to protect repairman from greasy buildup...ack!)

Friday, November 21, 2008

Musical Monday on Friday Night

Ok well I have to admit I went looking for the lyrics for this song because I thought they were saying something pretty sexy, in fact, too sexy for it to be playing from my daughters radio in her bedroom! Actually the lyrics are pretty tame, but I wonder if you can figure out what I thought they were saying.... he he!

At any rate, what a cool video by Finger Eleven. Check it out.

Happy Monday, everyone!


Thursday, November 20, 2008

Thursday Portrait

Flashback 1996
Seeing Lime's post of her lil kids and herself from a few years back has inspired me to post some old pics for Thursday Portrait myself. Thanks Lime, I am having a brain freeze due to too much cashmere and fleece inhalation.
Some of you already know this, but Little Rita was born 8 weeks early! That is why she looks like a little wood elf or some non human creature up there! When she was born, they told us not to expect her home for 8 weeks. Of course, I was in hell at that thought. Imagine how thrilled we were when the doctor announced that she could come home after 4 weeks. Believe it or not, she is one month old in that picture and barely weighs four pounds!
That picture up there was taken on Thanksgiving 1996. Pretty much 12 years ago exactly. Could I please look that young again?
As you can see, by the time Little Rita was 9 or 10 months old, she was looking like a right plump baby girl! That cat is Buster. He lived to be 17. What an awesome cat.
Ok there you have it, flashback!
Have a wonderful day!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Shop Til You Drop!

So, if you are one of those Christmas shopping types, come on over here, we need to have a little talk. Did you know that there is an online place where you can shop for handmade and totally cool items from all over the world without leaving your computer?
I am talking about Now think of Etsy like that other place that starts with an E, except that was especially created as a marketplace for artists to sell their stuff online.
Last year I also did a post about ETSY because I think it's really important. You can get everything you need and never have to leave the house. No mall, no parking hassles, no traffic jams, no gas, no lines, no returning stuff, no Walmart greeter. No slave labor, no sweatshops, no plastic junk that's gonna break tomorrow.
Additionally, you are purchasing an item entirely handmade by the artist, and no middleman!
So this year I did some random searches, and you can clearly see, this isn't the toy aisle at Target!
Here are some cool things that I found today:
clancy the little weirdo
Morticia Handspun Wool Haired Bedhead Doll

There are tons of handmade jewelry on Etsy but what kind of a friend would I be if I didn't share MY friends jewelry shop. Here is my favourite item from her store!
Chained Amethyst

Snowflake Dream Booties

Now you have shoemakers, and then you have shoemakers!
Zerkahloostrah custom retro platform pumps
..and they have lots of other styles, for men too! They get my vote for the best non factory shoemaker on etsy. (You're not supposed to be a factory on Etsy, as everything is supposed to be handmade, but you wouldn't believe some of the stuff that sneaks by the Etsy team!)

Burnin Love Fire Skirt

To heck with JC Penney, eh!

Queen Tiger Maple Pencil Post Bed

Now I think you will agree, we can do well without the mall! Head on over to Etsy and spend some money. I promise you the best service, the nicest and most talented people from all over the world, and terrific gift items in everyone's price range.
Last year Lime found some pretty hilarious stuff on Etsy and so I'm sorta hoping she will do her own search again this year and share what she finds. (HINT HINT)
And in case you haven't already figure it out, I have an ETSY shop too!

Have a lovely day!

Friday, November 14, 2008

55Flash Fiction Friday

"My new shiraz is ready", she cooed, gazing out over her golden vineyards. She watched in delight as her personal vintner poured the burgundy nectar and holding it up to the sunlight, she swirled, then took her first sip.
Suddenly, her eyes grew wide in horror.
"This wine is pure SWILL! Off with your head!"
In this 55 I get to pretend that I am some snobby rich wine baroness in the Napa Valley. Actually, I came upon this poster while searching an appropriate background to pose this skirt in front of. I ended up using a beach scene, and my standby checkered background. You can see it over there in my shop sidebar if you wanna------->
By the way, I know nothing about wine, and I don't really care for it either, so this wine poster girl thing is a total fake out.
Hey that gives me an idea, I oughta do a poster for the agriculture that I really love about Northern California....he he....
I wanted to post this because Bryan really oughta make that trip out West to see the home of his favorite cartoonist, and go ice skating at Snoopys with the Ratburns! So there you have it, your very own wine country poster chickie fakeout 55!

Happy Friday to you and be sure to run over and tell the G~man that you played.
My god, it seems there has been a miscount! 83 days only to go!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Thursday Portrait

Bangalore 2003

Beedi Factory, Mysore 2003

Time for the India countdown.
That's right, I am not going until February this time so I have a little bit of a wait still. But that doesn't mean I am not exciteddddd already!!!!!!!!!! I can barely stand it. Poor Mr Ratburn, the India bug has bitten him as well, leaving him incredibly envious. I really wish he could come with me again, but the $, oy, and then there is Little Rita, still not ready to go to India with us. So where traditionally I would attach my India counter when I have 55 days left, this time I cannot wait. Here we go, the countdown has begun, woo hoo!

Monday, November 10, 2008

Hiya Tex, Where Ya From?

Here it is, the moment all three of you have been waiting for:

Ease up on the linguine!
Have a lovely week!

Saturday, November 08, 2008

Musical Monday

I don't care what anybody says, I think Courtney Love was fabulous. I don't know what she's up to now, but I hope it's something good. This from 1999.
Enjoy it.
Doll Parts

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Thursday Portrait

What's this?
Royal mail?
Wow! Do you think maybe it's a crown or something? Hey look!
It's t-shirts for Little Rita, Gary and me from my very own pal over at Fortress Guinness !
Thank you, FG, I love it! My favorite color, how did you know? I'll see if I can round up the other two models later on after school!

Tuesday, November 04, 2008


I don't wanna hear any excuses. Get off your computer chair and go. It's only 8 am pst, you have plenty of time!
Now I don't wanna influence your vote or anything...but if you want pain, bring on McCain.
I could just roll over and die laughing at that little jerkface. (Don't you just love it when you have your own blog and you can call someone important a jerkface on the internet?)
Over the past few months, I have received lots of polytainment emails and BTW when you start hearing that word around, POLYTAINMENT, remember, you heard it here first. It's my word, I invented it. I have to say the most ridiculous email of all was this letter proposing that Barrack Obama is a terrorist, why, just look at that name AND his running mate, when you put both names together, you get Obama Biden, which sounds a lot like some sleazy little man we've been trying to squelch for years, so therefore you mustn't trust Obama, "they" are going to take over this country! "We can't have black men tellin' us wut to do, mah gawd, them guys wuz slaves when my granpappy wus alive. It'll be uh cold day in hell when ahm gonna lissen to some black guy tellin' me what for."
Now this blog of mine is at the point of 4-5 readers a day. Thankfully, I am pretty sure those faithful readers of mine don't need a lecture, but I am gonna say this to you passers by that need a nudge.
Pull your head out, people!
This political message brought to you by Susiestheboss
**UPDATE****America has spoken. Obama, you're the man. What a fucking miracle!

Saturday, November 01, 2008

What Makes You Think An Ant Can't?

I'm out standin' in my field!
Some of you have already seen these pics but Bryan hasn't. This was my 32 pound pumpkin that I grew last year. I was so looking forward to growing an even bigger pumpkin but the gophers won. Next year I am aiming for a 50 pounder, at least!
Oh! Do you wanna know what we did with the pumpkin after we had had it in my bedroom for 8 months? We harnessed it to a rope, Little Rita climbed up into a 40 foot redwood tree, and with a pulley system hoisted the pumpkin up there, and attempted to drop it for the big splatter! But guess what? It got stuck in the limbs of the redwood and so LR had to climb down and shove it landed on the ground with an unsatisfying plunk but remained unbroken. I wish we had gotten pictures, the three of us were in hysterics over the sight of the giant pumpkin wedged 30 feet up in the air in the branches of a tree, that and we had worked so hard to tie this yellow rope around the pumpkin only to have it fail....hilarious!
Finally, Little Rita climbed up into her fort and we handed her the pumpkin which she then shoved over the edge! There we received good splatter! From those seeds we grew this years pumpkins that the gophers ate....sigh....
Have a lovely weekend!

Friday, October 31, 2008


We're off to trick or treat!!! See ya later!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Thursday Portrait

I like this picture because I'm just chillin between posing as a fashion model. Yes, you are right, I am getting a little portly. Time to "ease up on the linguine." First one to guess which film that is from wins a prize. No googling IMDB!
I'm having so much fun right now selling lots of clothes. Sometimes I just can't believe it! They like me, they really like me.
PS I know I am a day early but it's just a habit left over from HNT days. I'm heading over to G~mans now because he's got the velveeta!
Have a good day, y'all!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Mispelled Misspelled Words of Wisdom

Little Rita's birthday weekend was a smashing success. She and 7 of her girlfriends hung out over here on Saturday afternoon before being shuttled off to the movies to see Nightmare Before Christmas 3D version. Of course being the kid that I am, I had to go too! Problem is, as some of you know, I am amblyopic. Just means only one eye works. That makes the 3D thing a little odd for me. I had the strangest tugging sensation on my "bad eye" when I put on those glasses as that eye was trying it's dangdest to do the 3D experience.
Needless to say, things were not so 3D for me, but still it was fun sitting one row behind the girls, watching them devour three huge bags of popcorn, two bags of fun size candy bars and various beverages. Do you have any idea the noise that 8 girls can make while busily munching popcorn and unwrapping crackly caramel wrappers?
So that was totally fun, but while we're on the subject of food, let's back up here to the party before the movie. Now being that I have only one kid, and a skinny rail of one at that, I am never quite prepared for the volumes of foods these 12 and 13 year old girls can put away! Before the party the fridge was jampacked with cake, brie, schmears(!), strawberries, chocolate, ice cream, etc....and after, it was like Mother Hubbards cupboard, i'm tellin' you!
Simply amazing.
Little Rita loves her laptop. Now if her not so computer savvy parents can figure out this wifi thing, she'll be online in....well, soon as we can figure it out!
In other news, I had a fun day at the market. Did ok, not fantastic, but good. Mostly it was a beautiful 85 degree day and perfect for hanging out in our town square listening to some really fantastic Ghanan drummers and dancers too. We have a fairly sizable Ghanan community in our town, and they are just such wonderfully lovely people. Many are multi talented dancers, drummers, and basket weavers, and they really liven up our market!
After the market we had our annual meeting. I am the president so I hadda make uh speech! You know, funny thing, when people find out that I am the president of the board of the farmers market, they give me freee tomatoes and stuff. Quite a few people have asked me if I can get them a booth in the market. With a little coaching from Gary, I have learned to smile and say, "I am just an elected official." :P It works. We blame everything on the market manager, and afterall, she gets paid, and she really is the boss, so that's just the way it goes. The rest of us are just elected officials.
So now I have that lovely Monday morning feeling when the kid is at school, the hubby is too, and I am just here, hanging out with the cats. Ahhhhh! Nice. Time to pop open an icey coke and enjoy my space.
And now I will leave you with these misspelled words of wisdom left on a bench near my market booth and brought to you by some local punk rampant. Also notice upside down martian head. Cool.
Wishing you a lovely Monday!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Thursday Portrait

Happy 12th Birthday, Little Rita!

Guess what we got our straight A student for her gift?

Shhh! Don't tell her til after school!